


Cautious Optimism

by Happy45



Category: Chicago Fire
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:42:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26062876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Happy45/pseuds/Happy45
Summary: The only thing Matt could think to do was drown his sorrows at Molly’s and hope for a better tomorrow - but then Sylvie slipped into the stool beside him and his night took an unexpected turn.Post 7x16/7x17
Relationships: Sylvie Brett/Matthew Casey
Comments: 23
Kudos: 116





	Cautious Optimism

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! 
> 
> This was inspired by a conversation I had with a few people on Twitter about Casey having some fun and also being able to address the hurt that came out of his relationship with Dawson. It's set after Casey is shot at in 7x16 and the Chaplain breaking up with Brett.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!

**Cautious Optimism**

Matt sat at the bar in Molly’s, staring at the beer bottle in his hands. He normally wasn’t an introspective guy, but with the direction his life was going in, he couldn’t help but be any other way. His wife left him, his apartment was set on fire, he was shot at. Every time something bad happened, he tried to convince himself that it couldn’t get much worse, but apparently, he was wrong. The universe was having a grand old time screwing him over. So now, the only thing he could think to do was drown his sorrows at Molly’s and hope for a better tomorrow.

“Penny for your thoughts.” He heard a voice behind him say as he turned his head to the side and saw Sylvie Brett slip into the stool beside him. “Could I get a beer Hermann?”

“Sure thing Brett” Hermann told her as he swiftly got her the bottle and set it in front of her.

“You wouldn’t want to know.” he grumbled as he took a swig of his beer.

Sylvie scoffed, “I could probably take a wild guess.” She wasn't oblivious to all he had been through over the past year.

Matt looked at her again and saw that she had just as sour a look on her face as he did. “Penny for _your_ thoughts instead?” he asked. He could probably take a wild guess about what was bothering her too – _the Chaplain._

Sylvie sighed, “The past week has been fun. Between Cindy redesigning the common room and Otis and Cruz keeping me occupied as my ‘roomdogs’…” she said with a little laugh as Matt quirked a brow in amusement. He wasn’t completely sure what a ‘roomdog’ was, but it was the most Otis and Cruz thing he’d ever heard. “But then the lights go out and I’m right back feeling pretty miserable about Kyle.”

Matt gulped and looked down at the bar, the guilt rising in him. Brett never told him why they broke up, but he’d heard from Stella that the Chaplain felt their romance was getting in the way of his job. It didn’t take a genius to work out that he felt that way because he kicked the Chaplain out of his apartment when he tried to help him. He knew it didn’t seem that way, but he was truthfully grateful that Brett cared enough to reach out to Sheffield on his behalf. It just wasn’t the right time for him to talk about it.

“I uh – I’m really sorry about that Brett.” He apologised as Sylvie looked at him curiously. “I feel responsible for your break up, if I hadn’t have been spinning out—”

Sylvie cut him off as she shook her head, “No, it’s not your fault. Maybe I shouldn’t be dating someone who runs after _one_ professional set back.” She snarked as Matt looked at her surprised. It was a rarity to see Sylvie Brett say anything harsh about somebody - unless it was entirely justified. _“Wow…”_ Sylvie suddenly said as he own eyes widened at her words. “That was _way_ harsh.” She reflected.

“Didn’t know you had it in you Brett.” Matt said with a laugh as Sylvie playfully rolled her eyes. “but maybe you do have a point.” He suggested. Surely if Sheffield was as smitten with Brett as he claimed to be, he would at least _try_ and work things out?

“No, he’s a great guy and he’s doing a really good thing for the CFD and he just wants to do it right.” Sylvie insisted, clearly feeling guilty about her comment. She really did respect what Kyle was doing, but there was a little nagging voice in the back of her mind telling her that his reasons weren’t fair. She turned to look at Casey when he didn’t reply and saw him just staring at her intently. He had that _look_ in his eye. The ‘I genuinely care about what you’re saying’ thing that he always did. It was honestly a little swoon worthy but that wasn’t relevant to right now. She furrowed her brows at him, wondering why he was just staring at her. “… what is it?”

“Your ability to see the good in people is remarkable.” He told her. Apparently, he’d been staring in a sense of awe. “I wish I could do the same.” He said quietly as he turned to pick apart the label on his bottle. Over the past few months, he’d become very quick at assuming the worst in some people.

“Well sometimes I wish I could be a little more cynical.” Sylvie retorted.

“Are you calling me cynical?” Matt teased in an unexpectedly light moment.

 _“No!”_ Sylvie quickly said. She didn’t want Matt to think she thought badly of him. She thought the exact opposite of bad. From the moment she met him she had the utmost respect for him and it never went away. No matter what new frustration Gabby brought to her about him, she never lost sight that he was a good man.

Sylvie wanted to explain herself a little further, hoping that she didn’t stick her foot in her mouth again. “I’m just saying you’ve had a bit of rough run lately between Gabby messing you around a little and then the stuff with your house and then the shooting. It’s understandable that you wouldn’t want to look for the good.”

“… you think Gabby messed me around?” he asked curiously. He didn’t expect that from his ex-wife’s former best friend. He cynically assumed that she thought the breakup was his fault. She’d basically said as much during the high rise fire a few months back.

_“How could you just let her go?”_

Her words were firmly engrained in his mind. After that, he assumed that everybody at 51 thought the same. But now – now he realised that Brett was just processing everything. She was trying to make sense of why her partner could just leave in a flash. Maybe his explanation changed her feelings on the matter more than he realised. Maybe she realised that Gabby was never his to let go of. That Gabby Dawson always did what was best for Gabby Dawson – consequences be damned.

“Yeah. I do.” She answered honestly. “I obviously don’t know the whole story, but I know Gabby and if you’re not playing by her rules, you’re often not playing at all.” She said sadly. She’d had plenty of encounters at work were Gabby dragged her into some sort of scheme that resulted in them getting into trouble.

Matt scoffed, “That’s a fair assessment.” he conceded. It appeared that the Chaplain wasn’t the only person Sylvie was willing to be truthful about tonight.

“You know what?” Sylvie said with great conviction in her voice as she loudly set her bottle down on the bar top and sat up straighter. “We’re not going to do this. We’re not going to turn tonight into a pity party – you need to have fun Matt Casey. _I_ need to have fun and I refuse to believe that you’re no longer a fun person.”

Matt’s mouth fell open slightly at her words. She thought he was _fun?_ He would love to know what else Brett thought of him – she seemed to be full of surprises tonight.

“What did you have in mind?” he asked cautiously.

Sylvie waved Stella over to place a new order in, “Stella, a round of tequila shots please.”

“Uh… ok. Coming right up…” Stella said as she looked between Matt and Sylvie, entirely confused over this unusual order.

“We’re going to have a few drinks and we’re going to remind ourselves that we’re here. We’re _alive_ and we should be allowed to enjoy life.” Sylvie said, returning to her optimistic self as Stella poured the liquid into the shot glasses. “Sucky things happen, but that doesn’t mean we can’t keep looking for the good in our lives too.” Sylvie lifted a glass and held it up as Matt followed suit. “There is plenty of good in your life Casey. Bottom’s up” she said as they clinked their glasses and downed the liquid.

Maybe things were taking a turn for the better after all.

* * *

“Farm Hunters is the way forward, I’m _telling_ you!” Sylvie said with great conviction in her voice as Matt listened intently. “Agriculture makes up 40% of the land in the US and there is some beautiful land out there, I would know, I grew up on a farm. They’re totally missing out on a money-making venture here!”

Matt nodded, “You’re so right. _You_ should start it.” He said seriously – well, as seriously as someone could be while totally _drunk_. The first round of shots hadn’t been the last. They drank and they laughed and they talked about nothing and everything at the same time. It was like the weight of the world was finally lifted off their shoulders – even if it was only for one night.

Sylvie gasped lightly as if Matt had just given her the greatest idea she had ever heard. “I knew you were smart Casey, but this is next _level.”_ She said as she started to laugh. “You need to get drunk more often if you come up with ideas like this!”

Matt laughed along with her for a moment before finding the breath to reply, “You can always trust me to make a reliable, well thought out suggestion.”

Sylvie rested her hand on Matt’s shoulder, “Casey, you are the most reliable guy I know.” She complimented with unexpected sincerity in her voice. “You would do anything for the people you love, even compromise yourself and what you want… which is sad…” she said as she frowned, realising the depth behind what she’d just said. “I can’t believe that happened to you.” She mumbled. From the look on her face, Matt’s relationships were flying through her head as she tried to grasp all of the fairly miserable things he went through.

Matt gulped. Sylvie’s words were a sobering truth that he didn’t think anybody realised. Hell, he’d barely acknowledged it himself. He really didn’t know what to say right now – maybe there wasn’t anything _to_ say.

Thankfully, he didn’t have to try and stumble out a few words because Hermann walked over to them.

“Alright you two, we’re closing up shop, cabs are out front for you. I’ll bring your keys to the firehouse tomorrow.” Hermann told them as they both groaned in annoyance. Why kick them out when they were having such a good time?! “Ha, trust me – you’ll be thanking me when you walk into work with pounding headaches that could have been worse.”

Sylvie and Matt slipped off their stools, settled their tabs and walked towards the door. They were a _little_ unsteady on their feet, but they didn’t really care. They felt care _free_ all night and they didn’t want that to change.

When they got outside, they saw two cabs pull up for them on the sidewalk. Sylvie turned to Matt and placed her hands on either side of his cheeks. Sober Sylvie would never have been so bold as to touch the Captain, but drunk Sylvie was not only painfully honest, but overly affectionate.

“This was _fun._ ” She emphasised as Matt grinned. “And we need to have fun more often. That’s an order.” She mocked. She quickly placed a loud kiss on his cheek before walking towards her cab. “I will see you in the morning Captain.” She said as she gave him a mock salute which he jokingly returned before slipping into his own cab.

The last time he got even close to being this drunk was when he and Severide went clubbing a few weeks back, so he knew he’d wake up with a sense of regret and annoyance that he wasn’t able to carry on like he used to. But at the same time, he knew he would be incredibly grateful for tonight. He was sober enough to know that he’d had a really good time – and that wasn’t something he would forget any time soon.

* * *

The following morning, Matt sat in his quarters with his head on his desk and his blinds pulled. He felt like an elephant was sitting on his head and it was entirely unpleasant. He was working off only a few hours of sleep. Normally, he slept pretty well after a night out, but he couldn’t last night – not when Sylvie’s words were playing on his mind.

_“You would do anything for the people you love, even compromise yourself and what you want…”_

They were still playing on his mind right now and he knew that the paperwork he needed to do today would be done half-heartedly. Suddenly, he heard the door to his quarters open and close as he turned around and saw Sylvie leaning against the door, a CFD baseball bat shading her face.

“Has the firehouse always been so _bright_?” she asked in disbelief.

“I think that’s the hangover talking.” Matt informed her as she walked further into the room and slumped onto the bed, her back against the wall. 

“I didn’t mean to go so hard last night.” She confessed. She just wanted to get a little tipsy and laugh. It appeared that the break-up hit her harder than she’d realised. The more alcohol she drunk, the more her pain was numbed.

“Yeah, me either. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad thing through.” Matt offered with a shrug.

Sylvie let out a scoff, “you are so cautiously optimistic.”

Matt grinned as he finally lifted his head from his desk and turned in his chair to look at her. “Well if you’re not willing to be your normal optimistic self right now then somebody has to be.”

“I’m just being a realist.” She reasoned as Matt moved to sit beside her on the bed, slumping back against the wall too.

“Right…” he mumbled, not having any more energy to banter back and forth about it.

Sylvie turned her head to look at him, “Why do you think it wasn’t a bad thing?” she asked. She totally agreed with him, despite what her headache might suggest, but she wanted to know his reasonings.

“I unexpectedly started to work through some stuff that I’d been burying.” Matt said with a shrug.

“Like what?”

Matt turned to look at her, wondering whether he should bring this up again. He didn’t want to make things awkward now that they weren’t intoxicated, but maybe Sylvie would be willing to be just as honest now.

“Did you mean what you said just before we left?” he asked vaguely as Sylvie narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips together, trying to remember what she said.

“I’m a very honest drunk so the chances are – yes, I did. What did I say?” she asked, clearly unable to remember.

“That I compromise myself for the people I love.”

Sylvie remained silent. The moment came flooding back to her now. She was painfully honest last night. When Gabby left, she really didn’t know what to think. She was hurt, yes, but she was mostly _confused._ At first, she blamed Casey, but she quickly realised that wasn’t even _remotely_ fair. She knew Casey, she knew his heart. The more she thought about who Gabby was, the more she realised that her decision to leave was probably made on a whim and there was nothing Casey could have done to change her mind.

She looked up at Matt and saw the pain hidden behind his eyes. It was so rare for him to be open and vulnerable with someone and she wasn’t about to backtrack and make him think he couldn’t talk to her. She promised to always keep her ringer on for him and she meant it. What harm could one more moment of honesty do?

“Yeah. I did.” She confessed quietly. She missed a beat before letting out a sigh and preparing to explain herself further. “Look, I love Gabby – or _loved_ – I haven’t spoken to her in almost a year so it’s kind of hard to call her a best friend anymore.” She confessed sadly. It was a sad reality that her friendship was broken, but that was life. People move on and it was just a reality they had to deal with. “I loved her and I loved her independence and fierceness – but it was hard watching her live her life as if you didn’t matter. She never wanted to be reliant or tied to anyone else, especially someone who might do things a little different from her. I think you ended up doing a lot of things you wouldn’t normally have done because you loved her so much and I really don’t blame you for that. There isn’t much I wouldn’t do for the people I love either.”

Matt didn’t say anything as he tried to process what Sylvie had said. He knew the only time that Sylvie was ever critical of someone was when there were completely justified grounds to do so. She always looked for the good, but right now, it was clear she couldn’t.

Sylvie panicked as Matt remained silent and began speaking again, “But my opinion does _not_ matter. Maybe it’s just a case of two good people with equally respectable but different outlooks on life who just aren’t meant to be. It’s sad but it’s not a great tragedy. It’s just _life_.”

Matt let out a barely audible scoff, “Cautious optimism...” he mumbled. It appeared she was practising a classic Casey trait. They sat in silence for a few moments as Matt thought through what he wanted to say. He’d never had the guts to admit what really went wrong in his relationship. The last time he’d done it, his wife left. He also knew how much the people of 51 loved Gabby and he never wanted them to think badly of her. Maybe finally admitting what went wrong to someone who clearly understood would help him finally move on.

“I’m a reasonable guy” he began as Sylvie looked at him, showing that she was listening intently. “and I always want to see the best in Gabby and there’s so much that I miss about her but uh… she chipped away at me. Bit by bit. I didn’t even realise until we had that fight right before she left. She always assumed I wouldn’t support her and even when I tried I never did it right. It’s a shitty feeling. Really, really _shitty_.” He confessed. Immediately his heart became that little bit lighter. He wished he’d done this a long time ago. “I’m really proud of her for what she’s doing. She was made to do this kind of work… it just hurts that it was at my expense. It was _always_ at my expense.”

“Somethings tells me you’ve been waiting a long time to say that out loud.” Sylvie told him, seeing the different emotions that were flashing across his face. Pain, longing, anger, pride, sadness.

Matt sighed and ran a hand through his hair, “You must think I’m horrible, I—”

“No, no, I don’t.” Sylvie made clear. She’d been _just_ as honest about it with him and she was only an outsider looking in. He had every right to say what was on his heart. He should be allowed to say it so he could move on. “You’re being honest, there’s nothing horrible about that. She hurt you. That was the reality… I guess your new reality is working out what to do with that pain.”

“Yeah… last night I realised that I need to stop moping around. I want things to get better but they’re only going to get better if I allow them to.” He admitted. He knew it was a minor step, but it was a step in the right direction. He got a lot off his chest and he now felt free to make the changes he needed to in his life. “What about you?” he asked. “How are you going to turn your hurt over the Chaplain into something good?” It hadn’t escaped him that Sylvie was trying to bury some pain too. She was a good friend to him and he wanted to be that for her in return.

“I’m not sure yet… but I have my cautiously optimistic buddy here to help me work it out.” She said as she nudged his elbow. The dynamic they’d developed overnight was a dynamic neither realised they needed in their lives. They’d always been friends, but this felt different. They slipped together seamlessly and their worlds felt brighter because of it.

“Yeah. You do.” He confirmed. Sylvie looked at him for a moment longer before she slipped off the bed and walked towards the door.

“I need caffeinated.” She announced as she put her hand on the door handle. “Someone got me _painfully_ drunk last night…” she teased as Matt let out a laugh.

“Right because _I_ was the one who ordered that first round of shots…” he replied as Sylvie smiled and internally laughed. “Last night was probably the most fun I’ve had in a long time. So thanks.” He told her gratefully. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed so much and it felt incredibly _good._

“Happy to help.” Sylvie said with a nod of certainty. “Don’t let the bad stuff weigh you down Matt. You don’t want to miss out on all the good things around you.”

Matt smiled softly at her _. You’re a good thing Sylvie Brett_ – he thought, but it wasn’t the right moment.

Although, he had a funny feeling that he would get to tell her that very soon.


End file.
